Cambridge Team Negotiating With Gillis

February 3, 2007

CAMBRIDGE, MA> An undisclosed reporter stated that a local team in Cambridge is seeking Matt Gillis. The team is called "America Sucks" and League president Ted Kennedy thinks Gillis would make a great fit on this team. The league is quite different than Burlington, every player is given 3 hits per player per game. Illegal Immigrants, convicts, Taliban members, and hippies are all welcome. 30 packs are entered into league fees as well.

"I'm quite honored to be offered a slot in this illustrious league" said Matt Gillis on MSNBC this morning.

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More details are expected on this late breaking story.